Meditation | Days 16 & 17

The snooze button has become my enemy this week. I haven't done any yoga because I'm rushing to make it to work on time. My mornings have been without meditation. So I've been trying to squeeze it in on breaks at work. They're little psuedo-prayers here and there, which completely defeats the purpose of meditation altogether. Meditation is pausing in the day to think on God and listen to Him (at least for those of us who haven't mastered meditation while working/doing). I haven't been pausing. The conscious effort is there...I want to pause. But I don't think I have time or that it's important enough to stop. In my opinion, however, meditation should not be on a strict schedule so much that it becomes another task to rule me. I just have to remind myself why I'm making a discipline of it: to draw closer to God. And if that desire really is there, then I will meet him. Sometimes it's a small, small desire. And sometimes I have a bigger desire to sleep or finish a project. Lord, help my first desire to be yours.

The verse Psalm 37:4 comes to mind:

"Delight yourself in the LORD;
         And He will give you the desires of your heart."

And I see Him giving me desires as a gift. Not desires that already exist in my heart. But brand new desires. Lord, make Yourself my true delight.

Meditation | Day 3, 4 & 5

I succeeded in 4 straight days of yoga and meditation. Foster says in his meditation chapter that it's easy for us to associate meditation with the Eastern meditation practices we hear about, but the Christian practice is quite different. The goal of Eastern meditation is to empty mind and your whole self. But the goal of Christian meditation is to first empty yourself and then allow God to fill your mind and heart. This is all paraphrased of course. I don't have his book in front of me.

I've been using online videos and sometimes it isn't easy to meditate on scripture when you're listening to an instructor that is encouraging you to free your mind of thoughts, release your worries, etc. Yoga is not the best way for me to meditate. But it's good practice for repeating scripture in the midst of activity. If I can gain the habit of keeping God at the forefront of my mind while exercising, working and playing, then Yoga will be worth it. But I want to learn meditation apart from yoga. The sitting quiet and still kind. Morning is not a good time for me at this point because my mind is so foggy that I fail to keep concentration and am tempted to fall back asleep. But I can see how quiet meditation might be very helpful at the end of the day before bed. So tonight, Day 5, will be my first try at silent, still meditation. I'm not sure what I will meditate on or use to help guide my thoughts. Foster encourages the imagination. Perhaps I will find a beautiful, peaceful place of nature in my mind to meet with God one on one.

I skipped yoga today since my mother-in-law and sister-in-law stayed the night. My living room was occupied and I didn't want to do yoga with people watching me. That's a little different than having the early morning to yourself or even taking a class. Now, if they would have joined me I wouldn't have minded. Maybe I should have asked! Maybe I'll resume yoga tomorrow.

Another scripture I meditated on during yoga this week: Galations 5:24 "Now those who belong to Christ have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires."