Meditation | Days 6-12

As I have been exploring meditation I find myself forgetting my end goal. It is not to get good at meditating, or to find the meaning of meditation or even to make meditation a habit. My end goal is to draw nearer to God, which is really not a very clear, measurable goal. There is no way to see if I met that goal or to look back on my days and see accomplishment or success. Meditation is a tool and an opportunity to draw nearer. I've been doing yoga, but am still struggling to use it for more than just exercise. Once I become more than a beginner it will probably become easier to meditate simultaneously. I'll just keep practicing, because I know it is good practice. Plus, my body is slowly feeling more capable than it used to. It is good for my physical well-being and encourages good circulation when sitting at a desk all day does not.

I have been practicing the "Palms Down, Palms Up" meditation that Foster teaches in his book. It's a great meditation for the end of the day. I simply sit quietly on my bed with my eyes closed, palms down on my knees. Then I recognize all my anxieties that are lingering from the day. I sometimes say out loud what they are and give them to God. "Lord, I give you my anxiety about my newsletter deadline. I give you my frustration with disciplining Oliver. I give you my obsession with wanting a clean house and disappointment in not having that.....etc." Then as I give those over and trust God in the areas I want control in, I turn my palms up and receive the Lord's blessing. "Lord, I receive your peace about work and the upcoming deadline. I receive your wisdom for disciplining and teaching Oliver. I receive your grace to let go of every task at hand and the patience to deal with one day at a time." I am thankful for this tool as it slows me down and teaches me to trust.

I want to practice his other meditation suggestions as well. Meditation on creation is one and meditation upon events of our time. I haven't yet decided how to approach these, but I'm excited to learn more. Foster ends his meditation chapter with encouraging words:


"You must not be discouraged if in the beginning your meditations have little meaning to you. There is a progression in the spiritual life, and it is wise to have some experience with lesser peaks before trying to tackle the Mt. Everest of the soul. So be patient with yourself. Besides, you are learning a discipline for which you have received no training. Nor does our culture encourage you to develop these skills. You will be going against the tide, but take heart; your task is of immense worth."

He also reminds me that meditation is not a single act, but a way of life.